Saturday Sentiment: I Can't Vlog, So ...

Okay, y'all know how much I love YouTube, right? And you know that the people I like to watch on there are a mix of topic-based, lifestyle-type channels and follow-me-style vlog channels. Some of the people I watch even manage to juggle both types, with a channel for their topic-based videos and a separate channel for their vlogging.

You know what though, I really can't even say why I love those vlogs so much. Generally, it's nothing exciting; they aren't all travel vlogs or anything really sensational - they're just people, living their lives. Sure, sometimes something more exciting happens, but generally the vlogs I watch are just a string of video clips like, "Hey, camera people, let's go to Target," or "You know what I've been thinking?" or, "Hey, wanna watch me put my Christmas tree up?"

Maybe vlogs are my guilty pleasure. I don't even know why I love them, but I do. And here's the thing - I'm not alone in that, otherwise they wouldn't be such a big deal. But maybe I can explain it to some degree like this:

1. I'm a single mom. I have two kids, both of whom have ADHD and are often extremely loud and rowdy even when they're on their medications. It's easy enough for me to deal with usually because I'm used to them, but they can be overwhelming for other people, and I'll tell you the truth; it's a little isolating. The other side of this is that I'm a single mom 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. My kids' dad isn't really around a lot, and most of my family are too spread out to be able to spell me now and then so I can get some time to myself. And the people I do know that are close enough geographically to be able to maybe do that sometimes? They're mostly single parents too, so they're just as overwhelmed as I am, and the last thing they want to do is take on more in their lives. I get it, but like I said, it's a little isolating. So, one of the vloggers I really love to watch is a single mom like me. She talks honestly about what it's like when she's overwhelmed and frustrated, and she's just as honest about how much she loves her kids and how dedicated she is to making sure they know they're loved - even when she has to lay a smackdown to make sure they know they're being raised right. She's winning life right now; she's successful, and she's building a good life by pursing her dreams in a way that's true to who she is and what she wants her world to look like. She inspires me to keep pushing on when I think I can't anymore. (To see why I love her, check out her topic-based channel here, and her vlog channel here. She's also a master at co-parenting, and has a spectacular relationship with her ex, who is the father of her children. He vlogs too, so you can get the dad perspective here.)
2. I was only recently diagnosed with PTSD, but I knew it was there a long time before I finally went to therapy and asked for help dealing with it. If you've been following me for long, you know that I grew up in a variety of abusive situations, and that those situations have (in part) led to me continuing to choose abusive situations in my adult life. Now I'm dealing with the consequences of the choices I've made - but in the meantime, my personal life is a mess, my mental health is a challenge to maintain, and ... well, that can be a little isolating too. So, another vlogger I love to watch is a girl who suffers from anxiety that's sometimes crippling. She talks about mental health and meditation, mindfulness, and her efforts to live a positive and happy life. She loves cats and makeup, travel and nature and laughing. And when I watch her vlogs, I find myself laughing too. Her smile is infectious, her excitement is downright joyful, and the way she and her boyfriend play together always makes me laugh. She reminds me to keep track of my own mindset, and inspires me to give myself the compassion I need sometimes. (Check out her topic-based channel here, but only if you're prepared to be immediately addicted to her utter cuteness. Then when you're ready to be hooked forever, go see how cute she is here, on her vlog channel. Her boyfriend has his own channel too, where he posts a mix of all sorts of things sporadically; that's here.)
3. I also suffer from depression, as I've mentioned several times here before. Well, you know the old saying, "Laughter is the best medicine?" In my experience, it really is; sometimes you just need to kick back and laugh until you feel better. For that, I always turn to the same hilarious guy, who posts mostly topic-based videos, rants, and challenge-games. He never fails to make me laugh, and even his vlog channel is entertaining and funny. (Check him out on his main channel here, and his vlog channel here. For his older stuff, which is also utterly hilarious, click here.)

All that, to say this: Sometimes, watching all those vlogs makes me forget how utterly difficult it is to stand in front of a camera, staring at your own face in the screen, and talk to people who may not ever choose to listen. Now and then I'll think, "Man, that looks fun. I think I'll try it." And I'll download an app or pull up my phone camera or even go all out and dig out my for-real camera, and I'll film something. Then I'll watch it, gag a little at my own awkwardness, and decide (again) that vlogging isn't for me. But blogging? That's totally my jam, right? So, while I plan to continue my regular Saturday posts, and (as of right now) I'm going to keep Sunday completely off my blogging schedule, I'm planning some big things for this site in 2017 - beginning with my own blog-mostly version of the daily vlogs I love so much, largely inspired by the recent influx of content due to "vlogmas."

I'm changing it up in a couple of ways though, the first of which is purposely not beginning in December. For one, December is a month where everyone's newsfeed is already full of holiday busyness, and if you're a person who follows multiple channels and/or blogs, the last thing you have time for is someone else to jump on the bandwagon. For another thing, December is a busy time for me and I want to spend my holiday moments focused on my kids, without adding the stress of another daily thing to the top of the pile. But ...

January is always a great time to start something new, and this blog has been an amazing way for me to step out of my comfort zones and edge my focus in new directions. So I'm thinking during the month of January, I'm going to ATTEMPT daily blogging (except Sundays) - under the context that if it works out, I'll keep it up indefinitely. I've been prepping for this idea for a while, and since I'm a sucker for weekly-style posts and social media conversations, I've spent this week brainstorming post ideas and "weekly" topics that I can rotate through here on the blog, as well as creating a list of fun post ideas that may not fit a specific day but still align perfectly with who I am and what I like to write about.

I'll be honest; this has me genuinely excited. I feel like it's going to be lots of fun, and I'm really looking forward to building a larger community on this site - and I think it'll be a good way for me to connect with readers who have been disappointed in the way I've had to cancel most of my event plans for 2017. Think this way, you get more of my writing, my life, and my focus - and hopefully, through your comments and interaction, I'll get to know more of you better.

Let's start with this: Comment below and tell me what kinds of posts you'd like to see, or leave a question you'd like me to answer in a future post.

And until next time,
Happy Reading,
B.